You saddly short yourself when you say that what you contribute is of little value. Your one response and advice within that response to my post was more valuable than you will ever know. Not having been in the JWs myself, but having people I love being taken in, I can use all the insight and information you can muster. I've found all of your posts that I have read to be helpful. Thanks for posting them!
Curious Christian
JoinedPosts by Curious Christian
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My One Year Anniversary posting here on JWD.......
by AK - Jeff inthis was basically my second year out of the organization - we mark our leaving january 2004. i came across this site and began posting here one year ago today.
[edited to say this week not today].
i have found many here to be truly a blessing from god - no matter your individual views of him.
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Poof - I have changed into.......
by AK - Jeff inone who is non-judgmental about others.. after 40 yrs of mind-control and judging everyone and everything in black/white, i am noticing that i don't even give much thought to the old witness predudice and self-righteous judgmentalisms anymore.. i could generally care less if a person i meet is a christian or not, hetero or homo in sexual prefs, wears earrings or not, how they dress, ect.. could it be that the witness fog is finally lifted and i am able to see the world without the witness filters?.
that is not to say i don't care about some of those things on some level, but they make little diff to me in general now.
i have become.... dare i say it.... normal!
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Curious Christian
Hey, Jeff! This is a little off the subject, but you responded to a post I put up yesterday, and were very helpful, I might add. Did you say YOU were from Indiana?!!!!
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Is recovery possible?
by gcc2k inhi guys.
i haven't posted here in a year or so, perhaps more.
i'm not sure what i want to say, and i'm not sure that i want to put it down, since the more info you give here, the easier it is to be spotted.
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Curious Christian
Hi!
I hope that before you decide to re-join, you will read Toxic Faith. It does not put down any religion and may help you to see things from a different perspective. Another great resource is Combatting Cult Mind Control. Again, it does not put down religions per se, but helps you to see why you are going through some of the issues you mentioned. Therapy would be great, but you would likely need someone who knows how to deal with mind control issues. A support group for former JWs might be a big help for you. I truly hope you stay with your family. You are right. Your children need you. Think of what might happen if you are not there to protect them when they need it. If my information serves to be true, while you were in the JWs, you were repeatedly taught that anyone who leaves the organization will fall in to immoral behavior....right? Could it be that subconsciously, you are doing what is "expected"? I hope you will consider the two books I mentioned. You can get them anywhere, sometimes CHEAP on e-bay. In the meantime, remember how much your kids need their Dad. Do not let anyone take that reality away from you. I would say that they are very fortunate to have you. You seem to love them so very much. That is worth fighting for. -
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Help...............
by lola28 inokay here is the deal, my aunt called last night and asked us over for thanksgiving dinner, my mom agreed to go and everything was fine until my aunt mentioned that my other aunt whom i will call evil witch would also be there.
my mom had already said yes and she would like to be there to see my aunt but i don't want to go if evil witch is going to be there.. a few years ago we went over for thanksgiving dinner ( my mom did not go b/c she and evil witch do not get along, but i wanted to go to see my cousin) it was awful, evil witch said horrible things about my mom, if that wasn't bad enough she said all of these things in front of my sisters who were only nine.. needless to say i was angry, i was so mad that i got my sisters and told them it was time to go home, we didn't even have dinner.
a few days later i called her and told her that what she had done was wrong and that she should know better than to say certain things in front of my sisters, she proceded to scream at me, and i told her to go to hell and to stay away from us ( can you feel the love?).
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Curious Christian
The only thing more pathetic than a miserable person who has nothing good to say, is the person who gives them the power to steal their peace and joy. Especially if you allow them to interfere with being with the people you love. Arguing will not help. Show some class and don't let her pull you into her misery. You will be a great inspiration to your sisters, if you handle the situation with dignity. I have made such a fool of myself by getting hot under the collar and flying off the handle. Those days are gone. I choose to be kind, inspite of what anyone else does. My Mom used to tell me to "kill 'em with kindness", and you know, it really works! Just try to bite your tongue and refuse to come down to her level. Try to think of things that might happen and how you can react in a positive manner. Your Aunt seems like a person who is very bitter. Misery loves company. Be happy inspite of her, it will drive her CRAZY!
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Not Quite Baptised JW, but getting there...
by Curious Christian inmy best friend started "studying" with the jws about 8 years ago.
she was off and on for awhile.
she just informed me that she and her family will not celebrate christmas any longer.
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Curious Christian
My best friend started "studying" with the JWs about 8 years ago. She was off and on for awhile. She just informed me that she and her family will not celebrate Christmas any longer. And after giving me the assurance of how "ok" her 11 year old son is with it, I asked her if she was going to quit Birthdays too. She said she wasn't going to stop that one yet, because she didn't want to change too muich at once on him. (Doesn't sound like he's all that "ok" with it to me!) She is going to about 3 meetings a week, and she is wearing the dresses and her son is in the suits......, but she has not become Baptised yet. I have read all the books and have been VERY careful not to ever put the society down. I ask the right questions when the opportunity presents itself. Just wondered if anyone could advise me on what I can say or do? She used to love Christmas. She is very artistic and her tree was an expression of that. And she loved the gifts. ( When we were kids and in a tiff, she would make up with me always before her birthday or Christmas, because she wanted the surprise! ) She is an avid horse enthusiast as well. Sounds like she won't have time for that, if she keeps going as she is. What could be going on right now, that would be helpful for me to know? And what will happen after she becomes Baptised? What do you wish someone would have said or done when you were at that point? I am so thankful for all of you. You have been there and know how to help and what it is like. I am so concerned for my friend and her child. She has been calling me a lot more lately, but we rarely talk about religion. I wait for her to bring it up, lest I should offend her. Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated!
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Advice Appreciated
by Curious Christian ini would like to start a small group that would mimic the jw approach, only specifically target those involved in jws.
i would like to hear from former jws who could advise me about what they wish someone had said to them when they were in the jws.
words to use, not use.
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Curious Christian
Already I have recieved some excellent advice! Thank you so much! I knew that if I could just have some contact with people who have been there, that it would make a huge difference. Keep the advice coming. There aren't any avenues to ex-JWs in my immediate area, so I am relying on you! Thanks for blessing me with your experience and knowledge of this subject!
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I need some advise regarding my son
by Seeking Knowledge in...who spends time with his jw father, and in turn, his jw father takes him to meeting, etc.
i cannot change this as it's court ordered (the nites he spends with his dad) but when he turns 6 (he's almost 5 now), our custody will change, and i will gain the time that he would otherwise be going with his dad.
until then, of course, he's learning things, that i would love to show him a way to think for himself.
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Curious Christian
I have never been in the JWs, but I found some info. that might be helpful to you. In an attempt to find an effective way to reach my friend, I invited a JW couple to come to my home and "study" with my husband and I. I noticed that their children's books cover the exact same things the adult ones do. It's just a repetition of the same things over and over. Your ex-husband is truly a victim, whether he knows it or not. There are some excellent books (Battling Cult Mind Control, Reasoning from the Scriptures, Jehovah's Witnesses Answered Verse By Verse, and many others available on this site or Ebay.) There is also another web-site that is very helpful called Witnesses For Jesus. That site actually has information on how to answer the Watchtower's study pamphlet titled:-What Does God Require of Us? This is the pamphlet they used to try to indoctrinate my husband and I. The questions we raised were very disturbing to them. We never attacked them or pointed a finger at them personally. The lady was a 40 yr. member and the man 20 yrs. They said they had NEVER been asked these questions before. It could be that your ex-husband has never been asked any of them either. If you attack his beliefs, you will drive him further in, so it is best to try to be peaceful and to nicely ask some of these questions. And your son will learn along the way that the JWs DO NOT have all the answers and that they are not in "truth". He has you! What a fortunate little boy! If you would like to contact me and find out some of the resources that I can share with you, e-mail me at [email protected].
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Advice Appreciated
by Curious Christian ini would like to start a small group that would mimic the jw approach, only specifically target those involved in jws.
i would like to hear from former jws who could advise me about what they wish someone had said to them when they were in the jws.
words to use, not use.
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Curious Christian
Thanks! We do not want to confront, but to approach and try to share the gospel in a way they may be more open to. After spending time with a JW couple, I realize that there are certain things they do that cause prideful attitude. Things "no one else" is doing. Going door-to-door and not plugging for money seem to be big. (We would not accept money, even if it is offered.) I would like to find points we can agree on and work from there. Maybe offer a Bible study using the Bible ONLY. That may open the door to a discussion in the future. Give them a friend outside of the WT. Peace and kindness are top priorities. The object is to get them to rethink a few things and to consider that perhaps all Christians are not evil, as they have been taught. And knowing about their doctrines, we could have a few good questions, should they bring them up. Things the Reasoning book just doesn't have answers for. :0)
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Advice Appreciated
by Curious Christian ini would like to start a small group that would mimic the jw approach, only specifically target those involved in jws.
i would like to hear from former jws who could advise me about what they wish someone had said to them when they were in the jws.
words to use, not use.
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Curious Christian
I think you misunderstood. My thought is to organize a group of others who know people that are in the JWs. Obviously, we will then have access to who they are, where they live, etc...
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Advice Appreciated
by Curious Christian ini would like to start a small group that would mimic the jw approach, only specifically target those involved in jws.
i would like to hear from former jws who could advise me about what they wish someone had said to them when they were in the jws.
words to use, not use.
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Curious Christian
I would like to start a small group that would mimic the JW approach, only specifically target those involved in JWs. I would like to hear from former JWs who could advise me about what they wish someone had said to them when they were in the JWs. Words to use, not use. Subjects to approach. Arguments we may have to counter. Our ultimate goal would be to make the JWs think and EFFECTVELY share the gospel with them. Since not many Christians are doing the job on their own door-step, I figure that those of us who would like to see our friends and family free, should take up the cross and do it ourselves. A JW friend told me that in 40yrs., my husband and I are the ONLY ones who have ever asked questions they cannot answer! Maybe those of us who care for JWs should be knocking on THEIR doors with the truth. Otherwise, they may never hear it.